by Rev. Cory Bradford-Watts

Readings

Matthew 5:43-47a

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others?

Read the written message below with music videos

The use of “Father” as a synonym for God by Christ has often been used as an excuse for the misogyny that many dogmatic Christian groups have gravitated towards, ignoring the many allusions to Divinity as feminine or transcending gender throughout the Bible and the rest of the world’s traditions. This sad legacy sometimes makes it hard for some to celebrate the beauty and wonder of the idea of a Father God, who is at once also Mother God, and the root of each of our own spirits. Our attachment to hierarchical dogmas of our own making, ignoring, and shutting down the heartfelt opinions of others because we deem our own opinion paramount especially with important matters, is quite the opposite of what it means to be a patient, heartfelt father (or mother), as our need for control (or else) has within it a tendency to destroy the life around and within us.

Despite the historical horrors of misogyny, fathers often give much of themselves in life from a place of loving compassion and wisdom. It’s been a mainstay for many families throughout the last century that dad wakes up early and works late, sometimes needing to sacrifice body and time for the welfare of family and community. Although these particularly unfortunate trends can primarily be placed at our societies’ lack of humane and supportive economic systems, they still speak to the compassionate engagement with our welfare and life that our fathers have often had.

Like the rest of us, our fathers have had little choice in the world or culture that they’ve grown up in. And I think we can forgive them (and each other) for the sometimes-hurtful tendencies that our distorted, misogynistic, bigoted class system has encouraged in them. For some of us, just the mention that our system might not have been perfect (although obvious) creates a knee-jerk reaction of dismissal and disdain, so deep our collective propaganda and groupthink have gone. One of the best tendencies that we can pick up from our fathers, however, is a patient self-reflection – becoming better aware of what our feelings are and where they might come from. Our best dads notice their engendered dominating motives (not helped by testosterone!) and start to let them go for the sake of their families and themselves. May we each do the same.

Our dads share their wisdom and love with us in vast and various ways throughout our lives, and, like our mothers, we tend to take them for granted. My own father has been a great source of spiritual wisdom and opportunities for reflection in my journey, and I give thanks for his continued love and connection in my life – as I hope you do with yours! Lately, he’s been a shining example for me in his continued positive transformations and expressions of compassionate connection. Some sages say that we can never repay our indebtedness to our parents, and so we are each tasked with honoring and respecting them (with our own wisdom, safety, and healthy boundaries withstanding).

One of the greatest blessings from Christ speaking of Divinity as the “Father” is that he often connects the term with loving others, and, in our reading today, with loving our “enemies” and praying for “those who persecute you.” There are many ways we forget this fatherly encouragement, a task that too many of us feels impossible only because we don’t want to dedicate ourselves to it (if we even think about it at all!).

In a way, this is at the core of Father God’s message to us; “love others as they are also my children.” How simple and yet so foreign to our daily thinking. When someone acts “out of line” to us, we can belittle and badger them internally or outwardly into dismissal or until they fall back in line. This can sometimes be especially true with those closest to us, or those who work for or serve us – thinking it our right to feel and behave domineeringly, when Father God repeatedly tells us quite the opposite is true.

Our own fathering tendencies can fall into the domineering category at times, and so Christ’s pointedness on how loving even our enemies with humility is synonymous with the will of Divine Fatherhood can be especially liberating lessons for our spirits, helping us escape our own reckless selfishness and misuse of authority. Of course, Jesus goes even further in these lessons, also teaching that we are one with everyone in God and that we abuse God when we abuse others.

The lesson hits further home when we draw Christ’s lines to their conclusion, that we quite literally hurt ourselves when we belittle, hurt, and dominate others, as well as when we don’t actively try to support and empower the downtrodden (which includes even those close to us and our own oft-dismissed compassion). This ties into the lessons that many of our fathers teach us as well: that we should share, be patient, be kind, and do our best to serve our communities while letting go of our tendencies to subjugate and manipulate.

Our fathers are often the beacons of heartfelt lessons in our lives. They hold space for us, no matter our mistakes, encouraging courage and empowering compassionate wisdom. Their humor and their light is contagious, instructing and providing with an eye toward the joy of God.

The root of fatherhood, indeed Fatherhood itself, is sourced in Divinity and points to God. All of fatherhood’s goodness is a manifestation of the Divine Father – the source of all life and the seed within creation. The process of creation, from evolution to the laws seeming to govern matter, are the workings of Divine Fatherhood, a gardening of the infinite expressions of Divinity in his offspring. All of us look like him, in his image and likeness even when we choose to turn away from fatherly living.

On Fathers' Day we can also be reminded of how great a loss it can feel when we lose our own expressions of the Fatherly One in loved ones. Those individuals who ground us in compassion and teach us about love, life, and the world, even amidst their mistakes. When we miss these wonderful individuals in an earthly sense, we can be strikingly reminded of the importance and wonder of having the Father's qualities so clearly alive in our lives – things we often take for granted because they are so much like the earth at our feet: vast, grounding, supportive, and openly at the ready with gifts of love.

Let’s celebrate our fathers and Divine Father today, as both are synonymous within our unity in God. Let’s remember our fatherly figures for what they are: expressions of Divine Love and Wisdom made manifest, on their own infinite journeys with the Divinity known by many names. As reminders and embodiments of God’s grace, gifts, sacrifice, and joy. Let’s also encourage ourselves and each other to let go of the limiting conceptions of fatherhood of the past, releasing hurtful ideas about what it means to parent, lead, and be a man or a person in our culture. Instead, through familial connection and other meditative and worshipful practices, let’s turn toward the peaceful, fearless living will of our Holy Father, expressed so beautifully in the diversity of his children.  

Peace and care to you,

Cory

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